From Mandatory, in case you miss their enormous logo on the chart, the pompous sphincter goblins. Thanks for the link, Liz T.
Wednesday, 31 July 2013
Not-So-Subtly Suggestive Vintage Ads Of The Day
Posted on 09:00 by Unknown
Or maybe it's just my dirty mind.
Here, chow on this.
C'mon. Just the tip.
WTF?
Miss MUFFet
Yes, if I can sniff your Klampen Koochen.
Please be fake.
It gets lonely at sea.
And those tell you that he is a professional wrestler.
Skinless wiener. Ouch.
A.k.a. Gang Rape
Here, chow on this.
C'mon. Just the tip.
WTF?
Miss MUFFet
Yes, if I can sniff your Klampen Koochen.
Please be fake.
It gets lonely at sea.
And those tell you that he is a professional wrestler.
Skinless wiener. Ouch.
A.k.a. Gang Rape
Tuesday, 30 July 2013
News: School Of The Arts Aims To Transform Boys And Girls Into Insufferable Young Men And Women
Posted on 13:23 by Unknown
From The Onion.
School Of The Arts Aims To Transform Boys And Girls Into Insufferable Young Men And Women
FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting that its incoming class of high school freshmen is their most coddled to date, instructors at Chestnut Ridge Academy for the Arts told an education conference this week that its mission is to take bright, precocious boys and girls and transform them into insufferable
School Of The Arts Aims To Transform Boys And Girls Into Insufferable Young Men And Women
FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting that its incoming class of high school freshmen is their most coddled to date, instructors at Chestnut Ridge Academy for the Arts told an education conference this week that its mission is to take bright, precocious boys and girls and transform them into insufferable
News: Man Stops Karaoke With Shovel
Posted on 09:32 by Unknown
From News.com.au.
Queensland man stops karaoke with shovel
July 30, 2013
The Village People famously sang the line, "Nobody can stop the music".
Well, apparently all it takes is a party pooper with a shovel.
Police are looking for a man who was so fed up with the musical talents of guests at a karaoke party in Tully in far north Queensland on Friday night he took matters into his own
Queensland man stops karaoke with shovel
July 30, 2013
The Village People famously sang the line, "Nobody can stop the music".
Well, apparently all it takes is a party pooper with a shovel.
Police are looking for a man who was so fed up with the musical talents of guests at a karaoke party in Tully in far north Queensland on Friday night he took matters into his own
Monday, 29 July 2013
Funked-Up Animal Of The Day: Zonkey
Posted on 11:45 by Unknown
I saw one of these in Tijuana. Except it was just a donkey painted to look like a zebra, which is probably what this is. If not, the poor guy is destined to a life of doing everything half-assed.
From News.com.au.
Zonkey: cutest hybrid ever
A donkey and a zebra have come together to prove Mother Nature doesn't discriminate when it comes to love.
This little guy is the offspring of an
From News.com.au.
Zonkey: cutest hybrid ever
A donkey and a zebra have come together to prove Mother Nature doesn't discriminate when it comes to love.
This little guy is the offspring of an
Adults Recreating Childhood Photos Of The Day
Posted on 09:00 by Unknown
Good stuff from Mama Gretch. Click any pic for a larger view.
Lip-Synching Performance Of The Day
Posted on 08:31 by Unknown
This. kills. me. Thanks for making my week, Suzanne Lybarger.
Thursday, 25 July 2013
Obscure 70s TV Show Open Of The Day
Posted on 10:33 by Unknown
Remember this one? Lassie meets The Fugitive. Not to be confused with the song by a similar name.
Tuesday, 23 July 2013
Craigslist Ad Of The Day: Sick-Ass '88 Mazda B2200
Posted on 16:06 by Unknown
best of craigslist > south jersey >
Sick-Ass '88 Mazda B2200
Dropped '88 Mazda B2200, guaranteed to melt some faces.
In need of the prow to seduce the lady of your dreams? Wanna stick it to the man from a few inches off the ground? If the latter's the case (and it most likely is) then this kickin' chicken car is for you.
I bought this car in 2009 and immediately grew a mustache upon
Sick-Ass '88 Mazda B2200
Dropped '88 Mazda B2200, guaranteed to melt some faces.
In need of the prow to seduce the lady of your dreams? Wanna stick it to the man from a few inches off the ground? If the latter's the case (and it most likely is) then this kickin' chicken car is for you.
I bought this car in 2009 and immediately grew a mustache upon
Boob Puppets Of The Day (NSFW)
Posted on 12:20 by Unknown
From the blog, Tit Thinks It's People.
Pebbles
Titney Spears
Skeleboob
The Breast Star
Stephen King's tIt
Black metal boobie
Carrie
E.T.: The Extra Breast-trial
Mickey & Minnie
Hannipple Lecter
Psychoboob
See more here.
.
Iconic Characters Set In Different Eras Of The Day
Posted on 08:11 by Unknown
From Mental Floss.
Biblical Star Wars
The Avengers - Feudal Japan
80s Game Of Thrones
Victorian Star Trek
70s Punk Mario
The Shining - Modern Day
Medieval Masters of the Universe
The Wizard of Oz - 16th Century China
Victorian Star Wars
Biblical Star Wars
The Avengers - Feudal Japan
80s Game Of Thrones
Victorian Star Trek
70s Punk Mario
The Shining - Modern Day
Medieval Masters of the Universe
The Wizard of Oz - 16th Century China
Victorian Star Wars
Monday, 22 July 2013
News: Not-That-Important Employee Snatches Best Donut In Box
Posted on 12:30 by Unknown
From The Onion.
Not-That-Important Employee Snatches Best Donut In Box
FORT WAYNE, IN—Employees at Sapphire Business Solutions expressed their collective outrage Friday at the brazen conduct of sales associate Isaac Schuler, a largely unimportant staffer who’s only been with the company for maybe a month and who had the gall to take the best donut in the box for himself.
As recounted by
Not-That-Important Employee Snatches Best Donut In Box
FORT WAYNE, IN—Employees at Sapphire Business Solutions expressed their collective outrage Friday at the brazen conduct of sales associate Isaac Schuler, a largely unimportant staffer who’s only been with the company for maybe a month and who had the gall to take the best donut in the box for himself.
As recounted by
Food On My Dog (Of The Day)
Posted on 11:27 by Unknown
This is Tiger and she's a good sport. Her owner assures us that she gets to eat nearly everything she holds on her head. If it's something bad for her, like a donut, she gets a treat instead.
From this site. Thanks, Bianca Deacon, for the link.
See more at Food On My Dog.
Quiz: Doobie Brothers' Lyric or Line From 50s Hygiene Manual Written By Angry Person Who Got Fired? (Of The Day)
Posted on 07:54 by Unknown
From McSweeney's.
Declarative Doobie Brothers’ Lyric or Instructional Line from a First Draft of a 1950s Hygiene Manual Written By an Angry Person Who Got Fired?
by Jeff Johnson
1. Oh, oh, listen to the music.
2. Gently pull back the foreskin. Now douse everything you see with industrial-grade bleach.
3. Pour melted butter inside each ear canal. Then look out the window. But not
Declarative Doobie Brothers’ Lyric or Instructional Line from a First Draft of a 1950s Hygiene Manual Written By an Angry Person Who Got Fired?
by Jeff Johnson
1. Oh, oh, listen to the music.
2. Gently pull back the foreskin. Now douse everything you see with industrial-grade bleach.
3. Pour melted butter inside each ear canal. Then look out the window. But not
Friday, 19 July 2013
News: Nation Hoping ‘The Newsroom’ Ends Before Trayvon Martin Storyline
Posted on 10:24 by Unknown
From The Onion.
Nation Hoping ‘The Newsroom’ Ends Before Trayvon Martin Storyline
NEW YORK—Reflecting on the aftermath of the George Zimmerman trial, citizens across the nation prayed Tuesday that HBO’s "The Newsroom" somehow ends before the show is able to incorporate a storyline about the killing of Trayvon Martin.
“Oh, Christ, you just know Aaron Sorkin is already dying to clamber up on
Nation Hoping ‘The Newsroom’ Ends Before Trayvon Martin Storyline
NEW YORK—Reflecting on the aftermath of the George Zimmerman trial, citizens across the nation prayed Tuesday that HBO’s "The Newsroom" somehow ends before the show is able to incorporate a storyline about the killing of Trayvon Martin.
“Oh, Christ, you just know Aaron Sorkin is already dying to clamber up on
Amusing Primate Of The Day
Posted on 08:46 by Unknown
Thursday, 18 July 2013
Unintentionally Inappropriate Kids' Drawings Of The Day
Posted on 07:51 by Unknown
Unintentionally. Right.
From the lovely and talented Suzanne Lybarger.
And one totally appropriate drawing:
From the lovely and talented Suzanne Lybarger.
And one totally appropriate drawing:
Wednesday, 17 July 2013
News: Man Killed In Bed By Falling Cow
Posted on 12:01 by Unknown
Third World problems.
From AOL News. Wait--AOL is still around?
Link from Chris Carey.
Man killed by cow falling in his bed in Brazil
A Brazilian man was killed in his bed when a one-tonne cow fell through the roof of his house.
Joao Maria de Souza, 45, was lying in his bed with his wife at his home in Caratinga, south-eastern Brazil, when the animal was grazing on a hill behind the house
From AOL News. Wait--AOL is still around?
Link from Chris Carey.
Man killed by cow falling in his bed in Brazil
A Brazilian man was killed in his bed when a one-tonne cow fell through the roof of his house.
Joao Maria de Souza, 45, was lying in his bed with his wife at his home in Caratinga, south-eastern Brazil, when the animal was grazing on a hill behind the house
Punk-Ass Goat Of The Day
Posted on 11:30 by Unknown
I would knock the shit out of that goat. Then eat it. I kept waiting for someone to come out with a shotgun. Charge THIS, motherfucker! KABLAMM!
Animal Sex Positions You Should Try (Of The Day)
Posted on 07:45 by Unknown
If you're gonna fuck like an animal, pick a fun one. I think I've done a couple of these. Definitely the mantis style.
From College Humor.
From College Humor.
Tuesday, 16 July 2013
Cover Of The Day: Thunderstruck Bagpipes
Posted on 13:19 by Unknown
AC/DC's classic on the bagpipes. RTFO!
Meme Of The Day: Philosoraptor
Posted on 08:47 by Unknown
Velociraptor: the Mitch Hedberg of dinosaurs.
Monday, 15 July 2013
Trip Advisor Users Whose Vacations Were Less Than Wonderful (Of The Day)
Posted on 10:38 by Unknown
I bet they were using Groupons.
From Tripadvisaargh via Buzzfeed.
From Tripadvisaargh via Buzzfeed.
News: Man Arrested For Having Sex with a Rubber Pool Raft. Again.
Posted on 08:00 by Unknown
From Elliot and Clevescene.
Man Arrested for Having Sex with a Rubber Pool Raft. Again.
July 11, 2013--An Ohio man was arrested for public indecency after he was caught engaging in sexual relations with a pool raft.
Apparently this is his fifth arrest for similar offenses.
In this most recent incident, Edwin Charles Tobergta, 34, of Hamilton allegedly stepped outside of his Harmon Ave.
Man Arrested for Having Sex with a Rubber Pool Raft. Again.
July 11, 2013--An Ohio man was arrested for public indecency after he was caught engaging in sexual relations with a pool raft.
Apparently this is his fifth arrest for similar offenses.
In this most recent incident, Edwin Charles Tobergta, 34, of Hamilton allegedly stepped outside of his Harmon Ave.
If Star Wars Characters Were Unemployed (Of The Day)
Posted on 07:03 by Unknown
From Marcos Munichin via DesignTaxi.
Thursday, 11 July 2013
Wednesday, 10 July 2013
News: Brazil football referee decapitated after stabbing player
Posted on 12:25 by Unknown
Sounds like some red cards were given out.
From BBC News.
Brazil referee decapitated after stabbing player
July 7, 2013
Football spectators in northern Brazil decapitated a referee after he fatally stabbed a player for refusing to leave the pitch, officials say.
An angry mob stormed the field during the amateur game in the state of Maranhao and stoned Otavio da Silva to death before
From BBC News.
Brazil referee decapitated after stabbing player
July 7, 2013
Football spectators in northern Brazil decapitated a referee after he fatally stabbed a player for refusing to leave the pitch, officials say.
An angry mob stormed the field during the amateur game in the state of Maranhao and stoned Otavio da Silva to death before
News: Kids Tired Of Hearing Boring Stories About How Father A Skilled, Generous Lover
Posted on 09:53 by Unknown
From The Onion.
Kids Tired Of Hearing Boring Stories About How Father A Skilled, Generous Lover
MANCHESTER, NH—Saying they had heard each one of his anecdotes “a thousand times,” local siblings Lindsay, Alex, and Danielle Curtis told reporters Monday they were tired of listening to their father repeat the same boring stories about his skillful, selfless lovemaking.
“I honestly don’t
Kids Tired Of Hearing Boring Stories About How Father A Skilled, Generous Lover
MANCHESTER, NH—Saying they had heard each one of his anecdotes “a thousand times,” local siblings Lindsay, Alex, and Danielle Curtis told reporters Monday they were tired of listening to their father repeat the same boring stories about his skillful, selfless lovemaking.
“I honestly don’t
Tuesday, 9 July 2013
News: Woman Who Hid Loaded Gun In Her Vagina Gets 25 Years
Posted on 09:46 by Unknown
That's one way to get banged, I guess. From The Smoking Gun.
Woman Who Hid Gun In Vagina Gets 25 Years
JULY 8--The Oklahoma woman who had a loaded handgun concealed in her vagina when she was arrested earlier this year on a drug charge has been sentenced to 25 years in state prison, according to court records.
Christie Dawn Harris, 28, last week entered no contest pleas to three felony
Woman Who Hid Gun In Vagina Gets 25 Years
JULY 8--The Oklahoma woman who had a loaded handgun concealed in her vagina when she was arrested earlier this year on a drug charge has been sentenced to 25 years in state prison, according to court records.
Christie Dawn Harris, 28, last week entered no contest pleas to three felony
Airline Passengers As Explained By Their Pants
Posted on 08:16 by Unknown
Amusing. But what about no pants?
From Wendi Aarons on McSweeney's.
Airplane Passengers as Explained By Their Pants
Wool Suit Pants: Will board before you.
Wool Hunting Pants: Will board after you.
Pleated Dockers: Will loudly talk on cell phone about ROIs and vertical markets.
Pajama Bottoms: Will be flying either to or from a city with a Señor Frog’s.
Sweatpants with Dallas
Monday, 8 July 2013
News: Man Killed While Peeing on NYC Subway Tracks
Posted on 14:43 by Unknown
A shocking development in the Big Apple. "Woodhull" sounds about right.
From The Daily Beast.
Man Electrocuted Peeing on Subway
July 8, 2013
The moral of this story: don’t relieve yourself on the tracks of the New York subway system.
Thirty-year-old Matthew Zeno, who was out drinking with a friend, was electrocuted around 3 a.m. Monday morning when he stopped to pee on the third rail of
From The Daily Beast.
Man Electrocuted Peeing on Subway
July 8, 2013
The moral of this story: don’t relieve yourself on the tracks of the New York subway system.
Thirty-year-old Matthew Zeno, who was out drinking with a friend, was electrocuted around 3 a.m. Monday morning when he stopped to pee on the third rail of
Products Of The Day: Smuggle Your Booze
Posted on 13:15 by Unknown
Rejoice, alcoholics. Now you can have bigger tits AND get blotto. Click the pic for more info. This is an uncompensated endorsement.
Pageant Performance Of The Day: And I Am Telling You That's Not Singing
Posted on 11:18 by Unknown
¡Aye caramba! It's like the record keeps skipping.
Thanks (?), RachRiot.
Thanks (?), RachRiot.
Andy Murray Hitting Things Of The Day
Posted on 09:09 by Unknown
He's so versatile. From The Poke.
Chicken
Housefly
The Queen
Dance floor
Drums
Annoying daytime TV hosts
Kitteh
The bottle
Pinata
Everyone
Chicken
Housefly
The Queen
Dance floor
Drums
Annoying daytime TV hosts
Kitteh
The bottle
Pinata
Everyone
Wednesday, 3 July 2013
News: Fossilized Evidence Reveals Spazosaurus Was Largest Doofus To Ever Roam Earth
Posted on 15:47 by Unknown
From L'Onion.
Fossilized Evidence Reveals Spazosaurus Was Largest Doofus To Ever Roam Earth
July 2, 2013
MOAB, UT—U.S. paleontologists have reportedly unearthed a nearly intact skeleton of a Spazosaurus, an extraordinary discovery providing evidence indicating that the awkward, uncoordinated, and peculiar creature was the largest doofus to ever roam the earth.
Preston Hopkins, the lead
Fossilized Evidence Reveals Spazosaurus Was Largest Doofus To Ever Roam Earth
July 2, 2013
MOAB, UT—U.S. paleontologists have reportedly unearthed a nearly intact skeleton of a Spazosaurus, an extraordinary discovery providing evidence indicating that the awkward, uncoordinated, and peculiar creature was the largest doofus to ever roam the earth.
Preston Hopkins, the lead
Pop Culture References I Have To Stop Using Because Nobody Under 35 Gets My Goddamn Jokes Anymore
Posted on 09:47 by Unknown
Getting old sucks.
My pop-culture references that meet with blank stares from people who think MTV was the first TV channel.
The Honeycomb Hideout
Laugh-In
Archie & Edith
Foster Brooks
Evel Kneivel
"Real cola taste, just one calorie, TAB!"
"Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee!"
Battle of the Network Stars
Robert Conrad losing his temper on Battle of the Network Stars
My pop-culture references that meet with blank stares from people who think MTV was the first TV channel.
The Honeycomb Hideout
Laugh-In
Archie & Edith
Foster Brooks
Evel Kneivel
"Real cola taste, just one calorie, TAB!"
"Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee!"
Battle of the Network Stars
Robert Conrad losing his temper on Battle of the Network Stars
Tuesday, 2 July 2013
Monday, 1 July 2013
Song Of The Day: Let's Talk Dirty To The Animals (NSFW)
Posted on 13:49 by Unknown
A classic from the late great Gilda Radner. NSFW for language. Link from the legendary Kip Sears.
Celebrities Without Eyebrows Of The Day
Posted on 11:55 by Unknown
An improvement in some cases. From the Tumblr blog.
(More here)
(More here)
News: McDonald's Introduces New 6-Piece Chicken NcNoltes
Posted on 08:00 by Unknown
From The Onion.
McDonald's Introduces New 6-Piece Chicken NcNoltes
Jun 26, 2013
OAK BROOK, IL—Touting its latest menu offering as a grizzled, tough, and brashly exciting dining option, McDonald’s CEO Don Thompson officially launched the company’s new six-piece Chicken NcNoltes meal at a press event Wednesday.
“America spoke and we listened—our new Chicken NcNoltes have the mouth-watering
McDonald's Introduces New 6-Piece Chicken NcNoltes
Jun 26, 2013
OAK BROOK, IL—Touting its latest menu offering as a grizzled, tough, and brashly exciting dining option, McDonald’s CEO Don Thompson officially launched the company’s new six-piece Chicken NcNoltes meal at a press event Wednesday.
“America spoke and we listened—our new Chicken NcNoltes have the mouth-watering
June Excellent Names Roundup
Posted on 06:04 by Unknown
From the daily sidebar, in case you hadn't noticed.
So take one. Just spray when you're done, please.
Loved to gobble dick
Yes, please let me put my home, my car, and
my family's future in the hands of a rodent.
This is the dawning of the Age of Quindarious
Willie Stroker, chicken-chokerKills at solitaire, sucks at poker
Congratulations. Now hurry the
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